Set Goals…

“If I have seen far, it is because I have stood on the shoulders of Giants”. God has been kind. I feel blessed to have been born in a wonderful and loving family; to have the best of education, and teachers who have touched moved and inspired; friends who have always stood by my side and encouraged; and colleagues who are supportive.

The one thing that has made a difference to my life, it is the habit of setting goals and an unwavering faith is Paul Meyer’s quote, “Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire sincerely believe and enthusiastically act up on must inevitably come to pass.”

“Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire sincerely believe and enthusiastically act up on must inevitably come to pass.”
“Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire sincerely believe and enthusiastically act up on must inevitably come to pass.”

Life was pretty much usual and routine, until one evening in the year 2006, when I met up with my childhood buddy, Vivek Savla. Vivek attended a program on Leadership and Management, and shared with me his learning. He asked me what my goals were. The first thing that came to my mind was about our manufacturing business, and I told him that my goal was to achieve a certain number in business, work hard, to be the best in the field. What else? he asked. I said I wanted to be happy, have a great life, have lots of money, take care of the family. He looked up to me and said, who doesn’t want that? That’s not a goal. That’s wishful thinking.

Honestly, I was lost, I really didn’t know nor did I understand what my goals were. Like me, many of us don’t realize the importance of goals. We don’t have goals because we don’t know how to set them. Often, it is the fear of failure that stops us from setting our goals.

Imagine watching a football game, with 2 teams and 22 players on the field playing the game – a football game with no goal posts. Imagine leading a life, where each day all that we do is get up in the morning, have breakfast, go to work, come home, watch television and go to sleep; wishing and hoping that tomorrow things will get better for us. But that seldom happens, and will not until we take control of our lives and our goals. It was that evening with Vivek, that I learned the greatest lesson of my life – “Set Goals”.

Goals give a sense of meaning and purpose to our life. Goal setting, along with careful planning provides a sense of direction to keep us focused on what we want and to work towards its achievement.

Our life has many facets – all of these can be classified in 6 major areas; personal, professional, spiritual, physical and mental, family and social, financial. For a meaningful and successful life, we should set goals in all of these areas.

For example, my personal goal is be a bestselling author, a motivational speaker, and coach. My professional goal is to take our company to a leadership position in the field of mixing equipment in India and across the world. My spiritual goal is to remain calm and

My Goals - 2015
My Goals – 2015
at all times; my physical goal to maintain health and fitness levels so that I can run the marathon at any given time;, my social goal is to touch, move and inspire all those who look up to me and to make a positive difference to their lives by sharing my blessings. To be honest, my reason for me sharing this with you today is to work towards achieving my personal and social goals.

Written goals are the seedbeds of accomplishment. The important thing while setting goals is that you need to write them, because writing your goals forces you to crystallize and clarify your thinking. It is said that the human mind has more than 60,000 thoughts each days. Writing down the thoughts which matter, helps you focus on what is necessary and keeps you on course. Written goals form the basis of measuring progress. Written goals produce motivation. Written goals form the basis of an action plan. Above all, written goals stimulate visualization.

Goals to me are SMART dreams. By SMART, we me Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time Bound. A goal has be specific, it has to be clearly defined. A goal has to be quantifiable – something that can be measured, it has to be achievable and attainable within a lifetime, it has to be realistic – something that can be experienced in reality. Above all, the goal is a dream with a deadline for achievement. It is time bound.

How then do you set goals and write them? When you begin to set goals, write down your dream list. A dream list will have everything that you wanted to have – a loving family, a big house, promotion at work, more money; a dream list will have everything you would like to do – grow you business to the next level, enjoy a vacation at your favorite destination. Just write down everything that you would like to have and do, as if there are no limitations at all.

Once you have written your dream list, you need to write them down as your SMART goals.
For example, my dream is to have a BMW car. But my SMART goal is “To drive my own BMW, 5 Series, White Color, by December 22, 2017”. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time Bound.
I am often asked, “If it was so easy, why don’t most people achieve their goals?”
The answer to this question is explained in my favorite quote, by Paul Meyer, “Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act up on must inevitably come to pass.”

The starting point of attainment of all goals is having an ardent desire. Your desire for the goal must be so intense that it will energize you to take action. It will give you the inner strength and drive to overcome any obstacle that lies between you and your goal.

The greatest obstacle that lies between you and your goals, is your lack of self belief. For achieving your goals, you need to believe in yourself and in your abilities. To overcome the negative thoughts and emotions that may crop in, you need to take complete responsibility for your situation. Once you accept total responsibility for your life, there are no limits on what you can be, do or have. Every step that your take with responsibility towards your goals builds your belief that you can set and achieve even bigger goals in the future.

Often people set goals, but don’t achieve them. This is because they don’t take the action required to achieve to goals. The most important aspect of achieving your goals is taking action, with enthusiasm. Having set your goals, you need to create an action plan for their achievement. You need to prioritize your goals, make a list of all tasks that have to be completed for accomplishing the goal, schedule time and set deadlines, create measures and standards to track progress, build the competency and skills required for achieving the goals, exercise self-discipline, identify obstacles and their possible solutions, identify people, groups and organizations who can help you in achieving your goals. Work hard to achieve your goals. There is no substitute to hard work. Action with Passion, Patience and Persistence is the key to achieving your goals.

My personal experience is that when you are absolutely clear about your goal, you do not even need to know where and how to achieve it. By simply deciding what you want, you will begin to get attracted towards your goal and your goal begins to move towards you.

Set Goals and take charge of your life. I’ll be happy to have achieved my goal through your’s.
God Bless

God has been kind. If not ….

As I woke up this morning, the first thing I learned was about my friend Parvinder Singh, meeting with an accident yesterday, on his birthday, 18th July. We are all so happy for Parvinder that he was unhurt and is doing fine.

God has been kind. If not …

One would recall the true life story, I shared about my dear friend, Dr. Mitesh Shah. Mitesh missed out on our “Fab Four – Sachin, Amit, Mitesh , Jayesh” trip to Tirupati in 2009, to seek blessings from the Lord for our new borns. His father-in-law was diagnosed with a cardiac problem and Mitesh dropped out from the trip just an hour before our departure from Mumbai. A day later, exactly at the time when the three of us were at the Tirupati temple, Mitesh was admitted to a cardiac hospital – just in time to be taken care of.

God has been kind. If not …

Not many of my friends know, that at the age of 9 when I was in Class IV, I was diagnosed with a brain tuberculosis. The prayers, support and good wishes from family, friends, well wishers and doctors helped me recover in quick time. Dr. Ashok Hazari, our close relative and family doctor has been supporting the family right throughout the difficult times.

God has been kind. If not ….

I would like to conclude by sharing what could have possibly been life’s greatest regret. On 23rd May, 2015, Maahir and Shourya were playing in the building complex till well past 11 in the night. As always, either we would get them or someone would drop them home. It was not to happen that night. At around 11:30, I had a vision that Shourya has badly hurt himself . Seconds later, Maahir rushed into the house with Shourya’s bleeding and roughed up right hand. Shourya’s hand was trapped in the collapsible door of the moving lift causing a severe crushing injury – pulled off just in time.

It’s been a difficult two months for our six year old, with the many visits to Amit’s hospital – the first one within minutes of the incident, well past mid-night. Every time Amit opened the bandaged right hand for the painful medical processes, we would pray for things being fine.

Under the watchful eyes of my buddy,

Shourya
Shourya
Shourya’s right hand is recovering. He hasn’t missed his school for a single day – and has been writing with his left hand ever since the accident. Soon, he will be able to write with his right hand again. Our little, delicate darling Shourya has lived up to his name which means Braveheart.

God has been kind. If not ….

PS – Our close family friends, two brothers, owned a popular fast food restaurant. Life presented them with many challenges, but with their ever positive and “never say die approach”, they did well for their families, inspite of critical heath issues. While the elder one (50) was on dialysis for the last 7 years, the younger one (47) too had to undergo the procedure on alternate days for the last 2 years. Both brothers had come to terms with life – going about their work, family and social responsibilities like all of us do. In January, the younger brother passed away within a month of a brief spout of ill-health. The elder brother had just begun to plan for the two families, only to be gone – 21 days later, after he developed some complications during the dialysis process.

Count your blessings.

God Bless

Life at Half Time

As another year of life goes by, the thought and realization that you are mid-way through life begins to dawn upon. Getting out of the thirties doesn’t hit you as much as the thought of entering into the forties. It seems to be the time, when life begins to question you –
What have you achieved?
What have you contributed?
Have you made the difference?
And above all – where do you go from here?

At “Half Time”, you need a “Time Out”. As we continue our journey in search for the answers – it’s time to reflect on the many gifts of life.

Thank God
One is thankful to God for his blessings of a loving and caring family, encouraging friends, inspiring teachers and supportive colleagues. “If I have seen far, it is because I have stood on the shoulders of giants.”

Set Goals
What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow. Our life is the creation of our mind. Set Goals. “Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon, must, inevitably come to pass.”

Never Give up
The journey of life has to be in pursuit of excellence. No matter how good you are, you can always get better – and that’s the exciting part. Never, never, never…never give up. “Koshish karne waloon ki kabhi haar nahin hoti.” (The one who tries, never fails).

Be Equanimous
Life is a journey – of ups and downs, of joys and sorrows. Life’s greatest challenge is learning to be equanimous in both pleasure and pain. The true measure of progress is our state of consciousness and the change this brings about in our thoughts, behavior, attitude, actions and responses. “Adversity introduces a man to himself”.

Life Comes Full Circle
Over the many years, one has realized that life is a great equalizer; what you give is what you get. Life is too long. In the end, life comes full circle. Circumstances and people will come back. Remember, “There is no witness so terrible or no accuser as powerful as conscience.”

Time is Precious
Money is a by-product of hard, honest work. Health is wealth. Our greatest gift and most precious asset is “Time”. And, while we may want to believe that we are at half time, none of us knows when the Referee decides to blow the whistle.

Have Faith
We often regret when things don’t happen as we plan them, only to realize later that it all happens for a reason. There is a popular Malayalam quote, “Njan pathi, daivam pathi” – it means, I need to do my half, the rest shall be done by the Lord.

Where Do You Go From Here?
Our life is on the line every single day. Each day, we script our story – through thoughts, words and actions. Every day we build our legacy, and everyday our eulogies are being written.
Going forward, one prays for good health, peace, and prosperity for self, friends, family; knowledge and values for children; and seeks blessing to be a good human being, a leader with the ability to touch, move, inspire and make a difference to the lives of those around. “Life is not about keeping or settling scores. It’s about understanding people the way they are. Above all, it is about choosing to use our life to touch someone else’s in a way that could not have been possible otherwise.”

“Success is in the big things. Happiness is in the small things. Meditation is in nothing. God is in everything.”

Life has been a Blessing

Life has been a blessing

A blessing of a loving family,
A blessing of inspiring teachers and mentors,
A blessing of friends who have always been encouraging and supportive,
A blessing of colleagues and team members.

A blessing of good health,
A blessing of peace,
A blessing of prosperity,
A blessing of education and knowledge,
A blessing of spirituality,
A blessing of equanimity,
A blessing of positivity.

A blessing of mother nature,
A blessing of air, water and food,
A blessing of India,
A blessing of home,
A blessing of work,
A blessing of books.

A blessing of the many goals that manifested for the good.

A blessing of hard work, persistence and perseverance.

Life has been a blessing of being loved and cared for,
God has been kind,
Life is Beautiful.

Life’s purpose has been to touch, move, inspire and make a positive difference,
God Bless Life.

Dangal – Being A Parent Coach

“We are here to play, not to bully,” called out the soccer club team owner, as he pulled out Maahir from the Somaiya Soccer Championship game, just minutes after the kick-off.  Maahir and one of his team mates, made some disparaging statements to an opposition team player, during play. This was the second game for the afternoon. The first game was comprehensively won, 3-0, by Maahir’s team, Soccer Cubs. An hour later, they lost the second, 0-10.

 

Maahir with The Soccer Cubs TeamMaahir’s Team – The Soccer Cubs, after winning the first game 3-0

Maahir was amongst the best player in his team. In the winning game, he fired the ball like a bullet, from the mid-field, right into the nets. There was little that the goal keeper could do, as he watched the ball sail over his head. An outstanding goal, orchestrated by the coach instructing from the side lines, superbly executed by the player. This proud moment for the parents was soon to be overshadowed by the act of indiscipline. Maahir had to sit out through the second game, even as his team players requested the team owner to get him back on the field.

That afternoon we played the role of parent-coach, Purvi and I had a serious conversation with our 10 year old. It was good to see him quickly understand what he had done wrong. He realized the price his team had to pay for losing one of their best players. One mistake – and he was out of the team.

Sports can be a great teacher, for those who are willing to learn.  Exactly a week later, we re-lived and added to the lessons learned on the field, as we watched the Aamir Khan starrer, Dangal. It was easy for the children to pick on the lessons of discipline and hard work (daily 5 a.m. training regime for Geeta and Babita), giving up on what you like (food cravings), being prepared to do whatever it takes (short hair-cut for the girls, non-vegetarian diet), serious and hard preparations (school girls competing against the big boys), fighting back from failure, perseverance, and more.  The hard part was for us, the parents, to realize that there was plenty in it for us to learn as well.  Every parent needs to play the role of a parent-coach like Mahavir Singh Phogat for his Geeta and Babita,

It is imperative for parents to share with children the importance of setting goals at an early age – so long as children understand their importance and are willing to work towards their realization. Maahir wrote his first goal when he was 5, and Shourya drew it up when he was 2.

A loving parent will always face the dilemma of being a taskmaster coach. That said, it is absolutely, necessary for the parent-coach to enforce strict discipline while maintaining an extremely nurturing atmosphere for the children. As a coach, always demand the best preparation and the maximum effort. But when your child experiences failure, teach him that it is not the end of the world. If he loses, tell him that he was just outscored on the day.  Hold him by his hand, talk to him and prepare him for his next challenge. Personally, I have been fortunate and blessed to have parents who’ve always maintained the balance.

A parent-coach should instill the importance of hard work, and repeated practice, in pursuit of excellence. He has to raise the bar every time they enter into the arena.  “You have to apply yourself each day to becoming a little better.  By applying yourself to the task of becoming a little better each and every day over a period of time, you will become a lot better,” said the famous basket ball coach, John Wooden. In the game that he was pulled out, Maahir had lost his opportunity to become better that day. It is important to teach children to love challenges, be intrigued by mistakes, enjoy effort, and keep on learning

A parent-coach needs to be on the sidelines during the game – to guide, correct, cheer and inspire. It makes a big difference. I recall Maahir telling me after a drawn game that I missed out on, “Papa, if you would had been around, I would have definitely scored a goal and our team would have won.” Likewise, I am happy to have Dad around at the workplace – it has made the difference to my life and career.

And finally, a parent coach should share honest and constructive feedback. As Carlos Dweck writes in her book, Mindset, “Praise should deal, not with the child’s personality attributes, but for their efforts and achievements. Children should be appreciated not for their intelligence and talents, but for the efforts, hard work, practice, persistence, and other growth oriented processes.” Words of encouragement and praise should to be carefully timed and chosen. In the film, the father holds on to golden words “Shabash”, in praise of his daughter until she has won an International Gold Medal.

A parent-coach needs to commit undivided time and attention to the children, because, it’s not about coaching them for a game or a sport, or making them good players. It’s about preparing them for life and making them good human beings.

The Ultimate Secret

– Sharing the words that changed my life

“Whatever you vividly imagine, ardently desire, sincerely believe and enthusiastically act upon, must, inevitably come to pass” – Paul Meyer.

I first heard this quote from my dearest friend Vivek Savla, in 2006.

http://youtu.be/Eu6g7vFi7hk

Also watch ‘The Miracle Man

Goal Chart

Goal chart